Ask Ashley: Dating Dilemmas

Question: What are some of the “warning” signs you should look for when you start dating a man.  How can you get his attention, without being to obvious…?

Response: Dating is a tricky thing. It is super simple, but at the same time it’s as complicated as getting a square peg into a round hole. The first thing you need to decide is, what is YOUR definition of a relationship. For the sake of this post, I’m going to assume that your definition of dating, comes with exclusivity  (like most women’s do). 

If you’re dating someone, there is a plethora of warning signs that the sh*t just isn’t gonna work out. I’ll list my top 4 (in no particular order):

  • The Mamas Boy: If he is constantly talking about his mom…pay close attention. There is a HUGE difference between having mama love, and having mamaidis. Mama love is a man who has learned a lot from his mother, and therefore developed a strong healthy respect for women. Mamaidis is when his mom is his bff and everything he does revolves around her. One thing you can’t do is compete with his mom for his attention. And more than likely, he’s gonna be the kinda dude who wants you to be another mama figure and take care of him. #HellNo  Not only is that f*ckin creepy, but it’s a losing situation that he doesn’t see anything wrong with.
  • The Borrower: Any man who constantly asks you to borrow stuff…is a no go! This man will borrow anything from a dollar, your car, to your social security # if he feels like he “needs it.” This dude is a selfish as hell, and not worth your time.
  • The Favor Guy: I’m sorry, but any person that is constantly asking me for a favor is just annoying. “Do me a favor,” is something that should be asked some of the time…not all the damn time! This is the guy who will constantly ask for favors, because he’s a lazy ass for not doing sh*t for himself…just lazy. I don’t live in the land of f*ckery, flowers, and favors like you do….and surely don’t want to.
  • The Hoverer: This is the guy who always has to be near you or touching you. At first this may seem super cool, and like he cares for you soooooo much. He may want to go everywhere with you, do everything with you, and always want to know what you’re doing. But that care can quickly turn into crazy. You gotta make sure you lay out some personal boundaries, and be sure to keep some things private. If doesn’t like that you’re doing that…his crazy may start showing…and it’s time he hit the bricks

Now I know I went on rather long about the list of “hell no he gotta go”dudes, but that’s because the 2nd part of your question is simple. Don’t try to catch their attention. Being  you should be enough to grab a guys attention. If it’s not enough for him…he’s not worth your time. Your beautiful and desirable as you are, so don’t change yourself for anyone. You only need to get out there and “show em you’re a tiger” lol. Hope this helped.


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