Today is the 1st Ask Ashley blog post. I’m so happy that I have someone who already would like some advice. Enjoy and I hope this help more than one follower!
QUESTION: I admire your blog love cuddling up in my warm bed, and reading a new post! Anyways, I have a question. I’m a single city girl, looking for: purpose, love, a beautiful family (a husband, and a daughter lol) but I have yet to find that in my life. When you were 24, how did you balance school, work, and a finding your love life?
ANSWER: First off, thanks so much for the compliment. I’m glad you subscribed and have enjoyed so far. Now onto the real topic at hand.
The first bit of advice I would give you woman to woman, is that your purpose should be something that makes you happy for you. By this I mean that you need to find something that you solely love to do for you, and keep doing it. Purpose is commonly misconstrued, as self worth…don’t fall for that illusion.
Now onto love and a beautiful family. Trust me…you don’t wanna rush those two things! As awesome as they both are, it’s taking more responsibility on than you actually realize. You gotta get you right before you go adding other people to the mix. But in the spirit of sharing, I will tell you how I got to where I am.
The number one thing that I would suggest is getting out there and meeting people. I did it in person, and I know that the dating app/internet dating thing is popular right now…but there is some sh*t that a profile can’t tell you. Things like the first vibes you get when meeting people. You don’t wanna risk letting jack the f*cking ripper getting to know the deets of your life and then not like him. #StalkerChronicles lol.
Once you find the right person for you (and be advised that whats right for you is both what compliments you and makes you happy), from there you let it grow naturally. Don’t force yourself into the “ideal man” or the “ideal relationship” scam either. There is no such thing as that, and whats perfect for you, isn’t really perfect. Accept the person for who they are flaws and all. Also, please accept the idea that you’re gonna swing in miss before you hit your home run, and just because you date around don’t me you gotta sleep around. Not everyone needs to take a dip in your lady lake if ya know what I’m saying. Babies will eventually come when the right one does, and you’ll get what you get so don’t have gender expectations.
The balance of all of this is like playing Jenga drunk. You know what you have to do, and its very easy in theory…but one wrong move and all the sh*t falls to pieces. It doesn’t sound fun, but it actually is. As long as you take everything with a grain of salt, and ensure that the end of the day you’re happy, it will all fall into place as it should. Try not to over analyze everything you do and over schedule anything. What fits will fit, and what doesn’t work, doesn’t work. Yes there are times when you can work your way into having everything work out, but there is no actual blue print as to how to do it. Go with the flow and take everything moment by moment and be sure to enjoy them all.
I hope this advice makes sense and helps you. I’m no professional, or someone who claims to have the right answers (those people are f*cking annoying btw), but I am a happy woman and I wish the same for you. Good Luck!!